Thursday, July 1, 2010

Variables and how we made a choice

About 8 years ago......

In my last two posts I began the story of how we chose to move for our son. Our goal was to downsize so we could spend more time together. I was also pregnant with my daughter and wanted to be a normal family that eats dinner together at home not on a television set working crazy hours.

In order to do this and live a comfortable life style we needed to move. The dream we had before my son was born was to move to a small coastal town in northern California. The problem with that is he is Deaf. He needs a good school, Deaf community and a pool of qualified interpreters. We needed a community that was very Deaf. A state school seemed ideal.

Of course we wanted to move to Freemont but realized our job skills were so specific work would be hard to come by and money would be an issue. We thought maybe we could move somewhere and learn new trades so we could move to Freemont later. Riverside was an option but not what we wanted. We visited a school in San Diego but again what would we do for money and this program was only through elementary. Another thought we had was we wanted to settle somewhere and grow roots.

We didn't want to get SSI for my son so we needed to have a viable income. We thought if we got SSI he would be taught the mind set of dependence. I knew people who didn't get married or look for better employment because they didn't want to loose SSI. I never want my son to think he needs to depend on the government to survive or improve his life. I wanted him to enter the world as an adult expecting and getting a full life. It also felt like SSI implied disability and my son was full of ability. I fully support people who need this service but didn't feel we should plan on it. So we needed to find new careers.

We have family in Portland and Seattle. If we moved to Salem or Vancouver we could see them often. My father in law offered my husband a job in Vancouver as a salesman in a brokerage. Bingo. Well maybe, my husband is not the salesman type but we decided to take the leap.

We were concerned about the state school but had hope we could influence Haddy's education. We committed to move.

We started flying up every weekend to look at houses. This was a big adventure for my son. He loved hotels and airplanes. It was March and we saw a freak snow storm. He got used to riding around looking at houses. He was four years old and the world was just a big party.

One day we were going to look at a house and we parked the car across the street from the house we were going to see. Usually we parked in front of the house. Sometimes he moves really fast with great confidence. Well that day he jumped out of the car before we could tell him which house and he dashed straight up to the door of the nearest house and......I leaped out of the car in hot pursuit.....he reached for the door...I screamed to my husband.....he turned the knob......I ran followed by my husband....he disappeared in the house which was not for sale!

A second later I was standing in a strangers living room. About four kids and two adults were all sitting watching TV with the most frightened looks on their faces staring at my little blond deaf cherub who had a confused look on his face. Slow motion...I looked son looked at me....the strangers sat frozen .....Of course this scared all of us. I apologized and snatched Haddy. From then on he asked us which house we were going to view. We would make a list and show him pictures talking about the features of each house.

None of the houses we saw were right for us. We wanted a cute old house with wood floors. Wood floors are great for deaf kids. Wood allows vibration to travel clear. If you are deaf you get this. Music, amp, fun. Stomp, turn, conversation. One day we saw the perfect house. It was cute, great for a dog, and had wood floors under the carpet.


So we are going to DeafNation in Las Vegas but can't book our trip because we don't know the schedule yet. Haddy is twelve does anyone know the best time for him to go? We keep waiting for the site to give a conference schedule.
So far we are thinking Sunday-Wednesday.

Gosh the schedule is so DST hee hee


  1. Haha, and wooden floors! My compliments to parents who would think of such a basic necessity for Deaf people! Hopefully you won't get tired of the constant stamping of your feet.

    When my family lived in a townhome, our house guests accidentally busted into a neighbor's unit after returning from an errand. Bam! Stamping on the floor after coming inside. Then barged into the living room only to confront several frightened Chinese people. Uh, oh. "Wrong house," they muttered, hands out in the air, and they hastily backed out.

  2. Actually, the schedule has been posted:

    Have fun! I SO wish I was going but it's too costly for me to go all the way from Vermont. =( But my best friend, Christine Roschaert who is a DeafBlind world traveler will be there to give two presentations. Hope you and Haddy can get to meet her because she's awesome! =)

  3. Dianrez that is so funny!

    Keri thanks, I was really looking for the conference schedule. I couldn't get your link to open is it the main schedule or the workshops?

    Wish you were coming it would be great to meet you! We will look out for Chritine.

  4. Wood floors. They keep me awake at night when people walk on them. This has been a problem ever since my kids got old enough to stay up past my bedtime. When they have friends over I don't care how loud they talk as long as they SIT.