Remember The Day He Was Identified

So tonight we are so busy. Everyone is just dealing with just normal stuff. I am, I have a busy young daughter and a teenage son. Funny how as they get older it gets easier but harder. No more diapers, car seats or political fights.

I was talking with my Deaf son tonight about his schedule in the morning. We have a family party and his dad is coming. He however has plans. He has friends.

I for no reason remember a few weeks after he was identified and I felt hopeless trying to sign with this really cute little baby.

I was in the book store at the Beverly Center with Haddy. He was so cute and I was a chasing him signing. A man walked up and signed, " You Deaf?"

"No, son deaf"
What happened next changed our lives

He told me my son would be OK... I didn't believe him.

This man told  me his thoughts and made me feel like I did something right. This man was a teacher of the deaf and deaf himself.  He ended up being Haddy's first real teacher. His name was Richard Kendall but we used his sign name RK. I often wonder what would of happened if
I didn't meet that man at that moment.  What if I didn't have one person just show up and give me the signal.

I am lazy now, that work we did just doesn't show up everyday.  Life is easy now but still hard.

Acceptance Or Apathy?

Here I sit in the same situation I have been pondering for fifteen years..... when do we walk away and accept it just isn't fair? When do we dig deeper and get the rusty soapbox out? When does mama come out of hiding?

I'm  used to being a fighting tiger jumping at every chance to champion my son's cause. That was important before he couldn't fathom the complexities of his life journey as a Deaf person in this country. The laws are complex and often ignored or misunderstood. My goal of course was to let go and let him take the lead when he was ready. That happened.

My son is getting good grades (he told me he has an AP class next year ) and hanging with his tribe of like minds (all hearing but they sign). They want to go to "Rocky Horror Picture Show" and you may judge me for saying OK.

I know the movie and the culture that surrounds it. I went as a teenager behind my parents back. I want him to go and experience this old movie with all the bells and whistles. I don't want him to miss the part where everyone yells "slut!" yep , I am most likely a bad mom. I just feel my Deaf son is capable. Capable of making good decisions and seeing this movie with interpreters will not in any way corrupt him.  Hearing teenagers  don't have to plan the date night. Mine does. No worries, I will pass on apathy and beg for accommodation.